EMDR
Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing, commonly known as EMDR, is a structured psychotherapy approach used to help process distressing memories.
What is EMDR?
Most memories become part of our personal history. We can recall them without feeling as though the event is happening again in the present.
Some distressing experiences appear to remain connected with intense emotions, physical sensations and negative beliefs. A reminder of the experience may trigger fear, shame, helplessness or another strong reaction, even when you know intellectually that the event is over.
EMDR is designed to help the mind process these memories so that they become less emotionally overwhelming. You will still remember what happened, but the memory may feel less immediate, vivid or controlling.
EMDR is best established as a treatment for post-traumatic stress and PTSD. Depending on a client’s needs and circumstances, it may also be considered when distressing memories are associated with grief, loss or other difficult experiences.
What happens during EMDR?
EMDR is a phased and carefully structured process. It does not begin by immediately asking you to focus on the most painful event.
Initial sessions involve understanding your history, current circumstances and reasons for seeking counselling. We will consider whether EMDR is appropriate and whether you have sufficient strategies and support to manage any distress that may arise.
During the processing phase, you will be invited to bring aspects of a distressing memory to mind while engaging in bilateral stimulation. This commonly involves following guided side-to-side eye movements or using alternating taps.
The exact way in which EMDR produces therapeutic change continues to be studied. The practical objective is to support the processing of distressing memories so that they become less emotionally intense and can be understood in a more adaptive way.
You remain awake, aware and in control throughout the process. EMDR is not hypnosis. You can pause or stop at any time, and you do not necessarily need to describe every detail of an experience aloud.
How EMDR may help
Depending on your circumstances, EMDR may help you to:
- reduce the intensity of distress connected with a memory;
- experience fewer intrusive memories or emotional triggers;
- respond more calmly to reminders of what happened;
- reduce negative beliefs such as self-blame, shame or helplessness;
- feel more grounded in the present;
- understand that the experience is over, rather than feeling it is recurring;
- develop more adaptive beliefs about yourself and your ability to cope; or
- engage more freely in activities or relationships you previously avoided.
The number of sessions required varies. A single-event trauma may differ considerably from repeated or longstanding experiences. Preparation and stabilisation may be an important part of the work, particularly where trauma has been complex or prolonged.
EMDR will not be suitable for every person or every difficulty. We will discuss your needs, readiness and preferences before deciding whether it should form part of your counselling.
When the past becomes part of your history
EMDR does not erase memories or change what happened. Its purpose is to reduce the emotional charge of distressing memories so that they no longer intrude on the present with the same intensity.
The aim is for the experience to become something you remember, rather than something you repeatedly feel you are reliving.
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Next Steps & 15-minute free initial consultation.
Discover if we are a good fit
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Book Your Counselling Sessions
I generally find it takes a minimum of six sessions to get the best outcomes with couples.
For this reason, I offer a prepaid discounted rate of $750 incl GST for six consecutive couples counselling sessions.
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Results
It isn’t about “fixing” you (because you’re not broken). It’s about understanding your relationship, asking the right questions at the right time and in the right way and seeing new possibilities.
Communication with your other professional advisors.
Sometimes couple counselling clients are working with other professionals (such as lawyers, accountants, or medical professionals) in connection with their relationship issues. If clients authorise me to communicate with their other advisors, I can do so.
Please note,I do not provide clients with any legal advice in our counseling work or otherwise.
How does EMDR work?
EMDR works by stimulating the left and right hemispheres of the brain (“bilateral stimulation”), using either guided eye movements or alternating tapping to reduce memory distress. Although clients will still recall these memories, they will be less intense and troubling. EMDR can also substitute positive and empowering beliefs for prior negative beliefs often associated with trauma, grief or loss.
EMDR therapy is typically done in phases. The initial, preparatory phases include assessing a client’s needs, education about the process and providing clients with helpful resources. In the middle phases, using bilateral stimulation, clients become less sensitised to (or triggered by) distressing memories and process them in adaptive, constructive ways. EMDR final phases complete memory reprocessing so clients experience long-term therapeutic benefits. EMDR is safe and recognised as a highly effective therapeutic tool. After EMDR, clients report feeling calmer, more in control, and better able to manage painful memories.
What have others said?
As one of my clients said, “I had traumatic memories that I was regularly re-experiencing in full technicolour. After EMDR, although I still recall these same memories, they are now in black-and-white and no longer deeply distressing. They are simply memories of something that happened to me a long time ago. I can go forward in my life in a happier and more fulfilling way.”
When the Past Won’t Stay in the Past: The Value of EMDR
Consider the story of James, – a fictional but familiar one. James didn’t expect a car accident to stay with him long after the bruises healed. At first, he considered himself lucky. He had walked away from the crash with only minor physical injuries. Friends and family reassured him he’d be
